I'm Dave.
Hi, I'm Dave!
I'm Not-Dave
And I'm not.

Despicable Bastards Productions™

We record ourselves doing bad things. No, not like that!

Long before Craps And Laughs™, one of the Despicable Bastards had an idea for a parody news show: Action News At Large™, or ANAL for short. Featuring anchorman Dick Little, feel-good stories lovingly referred to as Action News At Large Beads of Joy, D20 Weather and some of the craziest news stories our demented minds can think of, we think you'll enjoy ANAL with us!
But then more ideas formed. We wanted a show for our religious friends. Thus arose The Gospel According to Saint Bastard. This was followed by the idea for a show dedicated to all the facts presented daily on Facebook and other places, resulting in It Must Be True, I Saw it on the Internet. Soon after came Wait, Wait, Wait! What if...?, Random Musings of the Mentally Ill and The Offensive Hour.
With all of these shows, we were faced with two options: create lots of channels, or group them all together under one channel. Well, three options, because we could've just said screw the whole thing. But we decided to give it a tucking fry, and WTFN Television seemed like the ideal station. Updated whenever we get around to it, be on the lookout for all these shows and more (or less).

The As-yet Untitled Podcast

No, that's not what we're calling it. Well, maybe that's what we'll call it. It's our soapbox, and we'll damn well do with it as we please!
At least one of us is a grumpy old cuss, with lots of opinions on lots of things. So if you want complaining, insane theories, pointless rambling or stories that nobody else gives a damn about, this may be the place for you! Or maybe not. We don't give a shit. It's about our opinions, not yours! Go get your own damned soapbox!

Dave the Despicable

Despicable Bastards' Dave is a grumpy old man. Hear him bitch about and cuss out different things every week. Because all old men believe everybody should listen to them complain.

"Oh Christ, more assholes recording themselves playing video games!" Is that what you think? Well, that may be true, but this is different. "How?" you ask? Well... Okay, maybe it's not all that different. Except that we're usually in an altered state of mind.
Look, just because it's similar to other things doesn't mean it isn't good in its own right! Don't be a judgmental prick without at least experiencing it first!
With We're Rubbish at Games, we try to avoid your standard "Let's Play" approach to gaming videos. We also try to look for lesser-known, or at least less frequently done, games. We set out to see just how horribly we can do at each game, and often seek help in the form of booze. It's sort of like the Mystery Science Theater 3000 of video games. Only not.
Why not enjoy two drunken men playing with each other? Wait, that's not what we meant! Damn it. Well, just go see why We're Rubbish at Games.

"Feature Films"

Yeah, the quotation marks are there for a reason. These may or may not ever come to be. You never know with us. But the ideas are there.
Ideas like Shameless Titty-flick, about a couple of guys who decide to pretend to be filmmakers in order to see boobs. But when the lies spiral out of control and their non-existent movie starts getting nominated for awards, what will they do? Filled with comedy, drama and, of course, boobs, Shameless Titty-flick is a lawsuit waiting to happen!
Then we have Kung-poo: Shits of Fury. Need I say more? No? Good, because we don't have a lot to go on with this one. But it'll be funny. And probably disgusting.
Finally, the one that will never happen, an adult film for furries: My Little Porny. Hey, somebody needs to buy those animal-tail butt-plugs!

Still not enough? Christ! Fine, here's some more options.

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